(11:02:22 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: I saw it on reddit but iddn't click
(11:02:40 PM) Savannah GTalk: I was hoping he was gonna say it to his face, haha.
(11:02:45 PM) Savannah GTalk: still good though
(11:03:13 PM) Savannah GTalk: and I do know you're there for me, although honestly I was worried you'd ... be miffed about the post
(11:06:18 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: initially. it kind of upset me. I mean, of course it would. we both know what goes on inside my head.
(11:07:01 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: but I went on a long walk in the rain and thought about it for a long time, and I realized...I shouldn't be upset, and more than that I didn't have any right to be upset.
(11:07:58 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: because, however close we are, and however much we love each other, and however much I dote on you day after day
(11:08:29 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: it's in a completely different plane of existence than a 3 year relationship
(11:09:16 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: so it's just...none of my business to be upset because you're still in love with Alex. and then suddenly I wasn't really.
(11:09:32 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: I mean. It was a little...depressing because I felt like.
(11:09:58 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: sometimes feel like, we have a side game of tic tac toe going on
(11:10:02 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: on the chess board of your life
(11:10:11 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: but my life barely even extends past the tic tac toe
(11:11:18 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: but I thought about that more. and realized. I dunno. it just wasn't a problem. Friendships and relationships have entirely different kinds of closeness, even if you are good friends with someone you are in a relationship with
(11:11:47 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: so as much as I want, to have that kind of closeness with you, I can't...expect it
(11:12:45 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: and then that was depressing, until I realized just because we don't have it now, doesn't mean we never could. I mean, you had been dating someone since we'd known each other, of course we wouldn't have that.
(11:13:42 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: so then I kind of felt like I shouldn't be any happier of sadder than I had been before reading it, and I've been pretty happy about our relationship lately ( don't mistake that as me saying I feel like it's inevitable that we end up in a relationship or something along those lines, I just feel like...things are set up so if it's meant to happen it will). so I'm still pretty happy
(11:13:49 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: I'm worried as hell about you
(11:13:57 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: really really really worried
(11:14:00 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: but not miffed or sad.
(11:14:13 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: Sorry for the wall of introspection
(11:18:48 PM) Savannah GTalk: you return!
(11:18:52 PM) Savannah GTalk: I was about to call
(11:18:53 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: I feel like that was a very inopportune time for my internet to die
(11:19:10 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: did you get the wall of introspection, and the I'm worried as hell about you
(11:19:12 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: really really worried
(11:19:15 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: but I'm not miffed or sad
(11:19:22 PM) robbjedi@gmail.com/Home: and then I apologized for the wall of introspection?