Something

<SabreLime> My dog is eating my crutch.
<Cookie`> cool
<SabreLime> It's made of wood.
<Cookie`> k
<SabreLime> And is about to my shoulders.
<Smoko> Does it give your wife splinters?
<SabreLime> No, she never used it.
<SabreLime> Only my father.
<SabreLime> And I have it just standing around for some reason.
<Cookie`> oh dear
<Cookie`> this conversation is the best ever.
<Smoko> hahaha
<Smoko> I just realized what SabreLime was talking about.
<SabreLime> Took you a while.