1. You open the box of a recent purchase and an instruction manual comes out.
a) Skim it and start putting everything together.
b) Toss it.
c) Read it cover to cover.
d) Have someone assemble it for you.
2. You're thirsty.
a) Go to the fridge.
b) you're already wearing your beer hat.
c) Make your woman fetch it for you.
d) Make your butler fetch it for you.
3. Which of the following is NOT an appropriate time to cry?
a) Anna Kournikova gets married.
b) You're hit in the crotch by anything traveling over 10 mph.
c) Your date uses her teeth.
d) Your grandmother's funeral.
4. Who wears short shorts?
a) Queers
b) Women
c) Me
d) No one
5. Which of the following is false?
a) Women can't drive.
b) Crushing beer cans against your head is cool.
c) Never have a conversation at the urinal.
d) A man purse is still a purse.
6. You're having lunch with friends.
a) That would never happen.
b) You're outside grilling on a barbeque.
c) You're inside making cereal.
d) You're at a nice restaurant.
7. In the pursuit of the opposite sex, it is NOT okay to:
a) Exaggerate a story up to 400%
b) Give a woman a credit card.
c) Make your best friend double-date with her and her ugly friend.
d) Wait for her to get ready for more than an hour.
8. It is a sport if you
a) sweat
b) get injured
c) are on a team
d) can watch it on ESPN
9. If your friend comes to class or work hungover, you CANNOT
a) hide the aspirin
b) rat him out
c) page him every five minutes
d) turn down the brightness on his computer
10. You ask your girlfriend what she wants for Christmas and she says, "If you love me, you'd know what I want." She gets
a) an Xbox
b) flowers
c) something very specific and personal
d) a big-screen TV