Something

#!/usr/bin/perl -w
use IO::Socket;

$nick = "dictionary";
$backupnick = "dic`";
$chan = "#potat0wned";
$masterhost = "omg\@.*";
$serv = "irc.swiftirc.net";
$port = "6667";
$dict = "dict.txt";

$IRC = IO::Socket::INET->new(
						PeerAddr => "$serv",
						PeerPort => $port
							) or die "Failed.";
							
while(<$IRC>) {	
	print;
	#Checks for pings.
	if(/PING\s:(.*)/){
		print $IRC "PONG :$1\n";
		print "<- PONG :$1\n";
	}
	#Checks to see if the default nick is in use, if it is we change to the backup nick.
	if(/Nickname is already in use./){
		print $IRC "NICK :$backupnick\n";
		print "Changing to backup nickname!\n";
	}
	if(/Register first/){
		print $IRC "NICK $nick\n";
		print "<- NICK $nick\n";
		print $IRC "USER  perlbot 127.0.0.1 *  : DicTionaryBot\n";
		print "<- USER  perlbot 127.0.0.1 *  : DicTionaryBot\n";
		print $IRC "JOIN $chan\n";
	}
	#Listens for when to send info to ident server
	if(/NOTICE AUTH/){
		print $IRC "NICK $nick\n";
		print "<- NICK $nick\n";
		print $IRC "USER  perlbot 127.0.0.1 *  : DicTionaryBot\n";
		print "<- USER  perlbot 127.0.0.1 *  : DicTionaryBot\n";
		print $IRC "JOIN $chan\n";
	}
	eval{
	if(/PRIVMSG (.*) :$nick, (.+)\b/){
		my $chn = $1;
		my $meaning;
		my $def = $2;
		open DICT, $dict;
		chomp(my @lines = <DICT>);
		close DICT;
		for $line (@lines){
			if($line =~ /$def:(.+)/){
				$meaning = $1;
				print $IRC "PRIVMSG $chn : --> $meaning\n";
			}
		}
	}
	if(/PRIVMSG (.*) :!sayall\b/){
		open DICT, $dict;
		print $IRC "PRIVMSG $1 : --> $_\n" while(<DICT>);
		close DICT;
	}
	if(/PRIVMSG (.*) :$nick, add (.+):(.+)/){
		open DICT, ">>" . $dict;
		print DICT "$2:$3";
		close DICT;
		print $IRC "PRIVMSG $1 : --> $2 was added to the dictionary!\n";
	}
	};
	if(/$masterhost PRIVMSG (.*) :!clearall/){
		open DICT, ">" . $dict;
		print DICT "";
		close DICT;
		print $IRC "PRIVMSG $1 : --> $dict was cleared!\n";
	}
	if(/KICK (.*) $nick/){
		print $IRC "JOIN $1\n";
	}
}