* Customer: "Right! I demand satisfaction!"
* Tech Support: "I see. Well, I'm here to try and help you. What kind of problem are you having?"
* Customer: "It's not my problem! The 'commuter' I bought six weeks ago just won't work! I can't do a damned thing with it!"
* Tech Support: "I see. Do you mean it won't even switch on, or is it something else?"
* Customer: "Don't try to sandbag me! I know my rights!"
* Tech Support: "Sir, could you explain the problem you are having so I can better help you with it?"
* Customer: "I've called them all, AOL, Nildram, Tiscali, and none of them are any good."
* Tech Support: "Ok, so are you saying that you're having problems getting on-line?"
* Customer: "Look, it doesn't work! I want satisfaction!"
* Tech Support: "Ok, well I need to ask you some questions to help you with the problem."
* Customer: "Fine, but I doubt you're going to fix it."
* Tech Support: "Is your modem installed and plugged into the phone line?"
* Customer: "How would I know if it's plugged in?"
* Tech Support: (describes how the back of the machine looks and where the modem is)
* Customer: "Yes, that's just how mine looks, and it doesn't work, so just accept that it's broken!"
* Tech Support: "Which cable did you connect the modem to the phone line with, sir?"
* Customer: "I have to wire the stupid thing in?"