These are stories I've never told to anyone before because I've always felt that it's too personal. I do however think that it's an interesting story, and so thanks to the anonymity of the internet I feel confident enough to share my story.
You see, from the age of 13-14, I was a giraffe. Unlike most kids I didn't spend my early teenaged life playing Nintendo or doing sports. I spent my time walking around the plains of Africa eating Mimosa leaves and shitting in bushes. You might think this a bit of an odd claim, but I can assure you, it happened.
I don't remember how I started being a giraffe, but I remember that I first noticed it after remarking that my horns were itchy. Obviously, a 13 year old boy doesn't have horns, and that's when I knew something was up.
To answer the questions that I think are likely to come up; no, I didn't see what my pattern was like. From the reaction of other giraffes I assume it was fairly well regarded, no patchy bits or irregular blobs. I wish I could describe these in more precise terms. Also no, it didn't feel like I was high up at the time. I consciously knew that I was a long way from the ground but somehow it felt as normal as having ten fingers does to me now.
Anyway, I'm tired of typing, pick a story that you want to hear:
1. The problem with legs
2. The game warden is an asshole
3. My bush, my rules
4. Why shade is important
5. Me 1, Asshole hunter 0