Mine

on *:TEXT:!stats*:#:{
	if (%login. [ $+ [ $nick ] ] < 1) {
		notice $nick You aren't logged in!
	}
	elseif ($0 > 2) {
		notice $nick Syntax: !stats, !stats nick
	}
	else {
		var %user = $nick;
		%user = $$2;
		notice $nick Username: %user
		notice $nick %soldiers. [ $+ [ %user ] ]  Soldiers
		notice $nick Botlevel: %botlevel. [ $+ [ %user ] ]
		if ( ($0 == 1) || (%cookiespyrating. [ $+ [ $nick ] ] > %cookiesentryrating. [ $+ [ %user ] ]) ) {
			notice $nick Cookies: %cookies. [ $+ [ %user ] ]
		}
		else {
			notice $nick Cookies: ???
		}
	}
}