Mine

#!/usr/bin/awk -f
# G.R.I.D.S.'ify ur text for great justice
# (c) 2006 vxp -- contact me at bantown or ircnet
#

# fallback if the supplied message is shorter than 5 characters
$0 !~ /^...../ {
  print "\0035G.\0037R.\0038I.\0039D.\0032S. \00313\037/\\";
}

# G.R.I.D.S.'ify
/^...../ {
  # color pattern array
  colors[1]="\00304";   # bright red
  colors[2]="\00307";   # dark yellow
  colors[3]="\00308";   # bright yellow
  colors[4]="\00309";   # bright green
  colors[5]="\00312";   # dark blue

  # local variables
  current_n=1; curent_color=current_ch=0;
  message_str=$0; message_len=length($0);


  while(current_n <= message_len) {
    $current_ch=substr(message_str, current_n, 1);
    if($current_ch !~ /[ ]/) {
      current_color++; if(current_color > 5)  current_color=1;
      if($current_ch !~ /[!@#$%^&*()_+={}|\\\/?<>.,:;'"`~]/  &&
         $current_ch !~ /[-\[]/                              &&
         $current_ch !~ /\]/) { # is it just me or does awk fkn fail at regex
        printf("%s%s.",  colors[current_color],
                        $current_ch);
      } else {
        printf("%s%s",  colors[current_color],
                       $current_ch);
     }
    } else {
      printf("%s", $current_ch);
    }
    current_n++;
  }

  printf(" \00313\037/\\\n");
}
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