well i'm all fed and watered. i had some cereal (a 3/4 bowl of Weetos) and a toast (warburtons, toastie, miniloaf, buttered and sliced into two rectangular halves). then i had a glass of water and came upstairs. half an hour till the conference. will i make it?
oh i brushed my teeth too. that's important. new green toothbrush, with firm yellow+white bristles, and a tongue scraper on the back. i also got changed into my pajamas so i can immediately collapse into bed once the conference is finished with.
i feel sorry for the journalists having to report at the scene, having to lug everything from one conference to another, and missing chunks because they were too busy liveblogging what they just say or wiping the sweat that the person sat next to them just unknowingly dropped onto their shoulder or something i dunno. sounds a cool job though.
so, uh, still 20 minutes to go. i guess they'll be showing off a bit more of that Insomniac game, as well as apologising for the PSN outage and showing off Uncharted 3: Drakes Fortune.
i like the uncharted games but the third one's multiplayer sounds kinda silly and dumb, apparently you can turn into a swarm of flies and attack other people? what? what is this.
um what else. ah yes, the new psp. they'll show off more for that. and maybe announce that it's official name is PS VITA. i wonder how many of my predictions will be right? also that game Starhawk will be shown off, yeah.
3 minutes to go. i made a hot chocolate. secretly. the 'rents think i'm in bed.
oh god it's time and i haven't got a stream working yet oh no.
oh they're not showing it yet or something, huh. it's some people talking about the show. there's a staples building behind them. the camera keeps zooming in on the staples building. NO PRODUCT PLACEMENT HERE, THAT'S FOR SURE.
i think maybe there's half an hour left after all. oh dear. my hot chocolate will go cold.
i sure have written a fair bit so far despite the show not having started
oh the people are saying there's a delay for the conference, so it should start before half an hour away. looks like my hot chocolate will stay warm.
ow i just spilt some chocolate
and they just announced it's not gonna start for 10 minutes, that's 1:18am. yawn
all my chocolate is finished and the conference hasn't even happened yet. i regret having it, i'm too hot now. whew.
the telly dudes are previewing Bioshock Infinite. Tahts a pertty game.
oh it's two minutes away and everyone there has to put on 3d glasses
ITS STARTING ITS STARTING YES YES YES YAY
and it starts with a trailer
or something
a trailer of sony products
and a montage of games
now it's showing the new psp
now it's showing some games.
mechs and people and sonic and stuff
final fantasy 13-2 too, i think
rayman origins!
and the trailer has finished
heyyy it's our favourite spokesperson Jack Tretton
"there are a lot of people here" why, yes there are.
yep, he's talking about the psn outage. he's saying that the press are welcome, for all the controversy and panic sony caused for the press to latch onto. 76% of what he is saying is stats. 100% of stats are made up.
i wish he'd stop talking about netflix and films and carry on talking about games.
oh here's uncharted 3. yay.
it's a cool adventury hollywood-movie style series of games. they're pretty good. uncharted drake, the main character, is running around a rocking boat in the rain, all his clothes are getting soggy. he just entered the grand ball place and disarmed an unaware guard. he keeps stealthing around taking them all out quietly.
now he's outside the boat. that's a nice ocean.
that WAS a moce ocean. he's back inside and threw a guard against a wall to knock him out. what a cheeky man uncahrted drake is.
now he's climbing around some engine/storage room and some guards caught him. a guard walks over to him and at the last minute he kicks the guard in the crotch, steals his grenade and chucks it around
whoa, water has started flowing in realisticly from the explosion and is filling up the room, that's really cool.
now the boat has capsized, it's harder to get around because everything is sideways. also it doesn't help that a giant metal box fell on his knee and trapped him.
damn stop buffering
UNCHARTED 3: DRAKE'S DECEPTION
the end
insomniac games, now, showing Resistance 3 instead of that other game they just announced, overstrike. meh.
the boxart for resistance 3 is really nice. good design.
uh oh a ticker said that there's "no beyond good and evil 2 on this gen of consoles". can't wait for it to finally come out though.
back to resistance, it's a shooter. yep. i'm not that fussed about it. nasty aliens vs people who dislike the aliens.
"i think maybe you all dont have 70inch diagonal screens at home (except maybe jack tretton)"
3d 3d 3d 3d 3d 3d 3d 3d 3d 3d 3d
God of War origins collection, now in 3d
Ico and Shadow of the Colossus collection 3d (that's an exciting thing, but is old news) (because these are excellent ps2 titles)
Playstation 3D telly. two people playing the same game, can see two different screens completely. THAT'LL STOP THEM DARNED SCREEN-PEEKERS. quite a bit of applause.
Universal 3d glasses that work with lotsa 3d tellies.
The telly comes with resistance, a pair of glasses. $499, uh oh
playstation move stuff, or as the guy from the ubisoft conference said, the 'sony joy rod. hurr i made dick joke'
uh oh a sports game demo. basketball
the only good basketball game is BARKLEY SHUT UP AND JAM GAIDEN and that's because it's a parady rpg and owns. charles barkley performed a 'chaos dunk' which was immensely destructive and caused basketball to be outlawed.
er the actual presentation, there's a dude saying the game is "scarily realistic".
now they're showing 'medievil moves', a ps move game with fantasy and stuff. i think it's on-rails. you can throw shurikens, fire arrow, and slash stuff with swords, all with motion gestures. it sure is gimmick in here. the guy playing it looks like a soldier.
now they're showing a game that comes out tomorrow, infamous 2, because it has motion controls. it's a sucker punch game. i'm getting the first for free because of the psn outage. it's some game about dudes with super powers and moral choices, or something like that.
it's 2am. i'm tired. i hope i don't fall asleep at the keyboard.
oh yay LittleBIGPlanet 2 move controls stuffs, they come out in september.
Starhawk, now. its a game with mass onfoot/vehicular/mechular/spaceshipular combat on and around planets and galaxies.
oh neat what's this game...OH YES YES YESY EYSE YWSUHDFILASFUHLASIVRWILUCKFJUIHVI HNI
IT'S SLY COOPER YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
OH GOD I AM SO HAPPY YESSSSSSSS I DIDNT EVEN THINK OF THIS
SLY RACCOON 4 YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSS
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES YESY ESY EYS YESSSSSSS
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
OH MAN OH MAN OH YE oh what goddamnit demitri, don't pretend to be sly
but SLY RACCOON 4 YESSSSSSSSSSSSS okay staying up all night was worth it just for this. i am excite.
and the sly teaser has gone. whoa, now there's a game called DUST about planetary conquest, but it also links to EVE Online which is a big space mmo. that sounds cool. can't say i'd actually play it though, looks kinda a generic space marine grey/brown shooter affair
now it's bioshock infinite i think. yeah. i could tell because of the scary disproprtionate magic girl woman accidentally teleporting everyone to the past and back again.
the bioshock creator is talking about how they decided to use the Move to 'interact' with said magic girl. yep.
and a new bioshock on the new psp
hee the conference has been on for an hour
saints row 3 has exclusive content on the ps3, sounds kinda dumb. i don't like the idea of multiplat games having exclusive content like levels and stuff on particular consoles
star trek game. star trek prequel game. the trailer had a generic alarm sound effect. lotsa stars and stuff.
EA stuff. ssx. exclusive mount fuji level. meh. need for speed, exclusive cars. meh. battlefield 3, battlefield 1943 comes on the disc free. at least that's not exclusive.
my paragraphs and description have been getting progressively shorter i think
"LOOK AT THAT TIE HE'S WEARING. ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR THE TIE", says a dude who just came on. okay...
whoa the original psp was 7 years ago??? whoa time flies.
playstation content available via Playstation Suite, on stuff like Android phones and other systems.
oh oh he's gonna announce the name of the new psp i think. it does sound a really cool console. go on man...
"PLAYSTATION VITA. what a surprise. that sure wasn't leaked a coupla days ago.
two analogue sticks, multitouch screen, front and rear touchpads, front and rear cameras. just gotta hope they announce a reasonable price.
uh oh, not looking good. "exclusive carrier" for the internet. deary me. we know how that went for the iphone. heard a coupla intakes of breath and sighs.
they're gonna show some demos. uncharted: golden abyss first. MORE LIKE UNCHARTED: GOLDEN SHOWER AMIRITE? I'M TIRED HAHAHAHAH
nice graphics, gimmicky touchscreen melee controls, but you can just use normal controls too, which is a relief. looks quite good, i'd say it definitely looks as good as at least Uncharted 1. just gotta hope the ai is as good as #2's.
a new game called RUIN which is directly compatible with the ps3 whatever that means. this guy is breathing really heavily. ah it's an isometric hack'n'slash loot'em'up. social networking mcguffins. oh he's attacking the lair of a rival friend or something. like if another player is attacking your lair, you can stop them and stuff. and you can put it on the ps3 too, resuming from exactly where you left off from your ps3, that's cool.
i think the conference is almost doneish. another person is coming on though
oh it's modnation racers. the demonstrator is keeps gulping and slightly giggling. they're making a racing track using the touchscreen controls in the game. whoa i feel dizzy. haha you can push up on the rear touchpad to make mountains. the creation mode seems kinda laggy. does seem pretty cool otherwise, but i tried the original ps3 one and the actual gameplay was kinda dull and just wasn't the racing version of littlebigplanet it wanted to be.
SPEAKING OF WHICH. play create share stuffs. littlebigplanet on playstation vita.
haha, an LBP-made version of Globulous. This music's cool, i wonder what it is. i'll have to internets for it. Oh neat, all the tools from LBP 2 are in it. also touchscreen control possibilities. okay that's pretty cool too.
street fighter vs tekken. lotsa applause and cheers. HADOUKEN.
a psvita version? I WASN'T EXPECTING THAT.
i'm tired.
oh a character from infamous is in the game too for some reason. okay, if you say so. i like how they have to manually record the psvita footage with a camera. haha, tha characters look pretty cool all in the street fighter art style. lotsa applause.
EVERY DEVELOPER IS MAKING A VITA GAME. apparently.
now a vita montage. uncharted, wipeout, little busters, littlebigplanet, Sound Scape or whatever it's called (looks cool), some unknown rpg( looks cool), snooker, modnation racers, super stardust vita (looks neat), ruin, some cheesy augmented reality fighting game, hotshots golf kawaii desu animu figures, tennis, misc brawler, END OF MONTAGE.
Vita is available this winter.
Wifi model or 3g model
$249 for wifi, that's really good. well done sony
$299 for 3g+wifi.
i'm tired
haha jack tretton made fun of his own "RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDGGGGGEE RAAAACCERRRRR" line, cool dude.
and it is over.
nighty night