Message posted on Stardate 06100.8 at 2042 hours
Posted by Fleet Captain Bob Hillis (Director of Pie).
Today, I woke up in STF's evil alternate universe. The ONE THING I was assured would NOT happen, has. I generally remain silent when most pencil-headed things come down the pike as they rarely affect the day-to-day role playing, but now my feathers are ruffled.
Today, I was notified that I must change the class of the USS Columbus since the design predates some SSSF format, a triviality instituted sometime later. The Columbus class was approved in 2000 and has been a stable role playing environment since. But now, it must be changed or the entire club could potentially fall apart and the universe plunged into chaos.
I cannot update the Columbus design because the original designer, Jeff Field, appears to be unreachable. I reviewed the Columbus design and those of other approved ships. I did find some stark differences. The newer approved designs are written in a smaller font. They also include more nifty quotes from the likes of Han Solo and Princess Leia (Columbus has alot of Monty Python stuff). I can understand the urgency of this change (yes, that was sarcasm).
So, I contacted the appropriate authorities and asked why. The following are a short list of my favorite justifications:
1) The SSSF format makes it easier for new people to find the bathrooms.
2) It is a rule.
3) For the betterment of the club.
Okay. Let me bring a bit of common since back to the discussion. First of all, in my time as XO and CO of Columbus, not one single newbie has had an accident as a result of unmarked restrooms. They all know they can simply ask the computer where to go.
Well, so it's also a rule. It appears to be a rule that has LONG been ignored, with good reason from my perspective. It's stupid. It seems that a select few people want more rules.. more constraint. Unfortunately, the current political environment fosters this. The only reason this is now an issue is because of one man's OCD.
The club is NOT bettered by this silliness. I submit to you: The Columbus is a more important part of STF than the Engineering Department. Frankly, the ED could be turned into a waste reclamation facility and 95% of STF wouldn't even notice or care.
So, for now, the Columbus class will be shelved and she'll be given a new class. Don't think one minute I intend for it to collect dust. The Columbus design specs have been copied, so they can be later revived. I don't intend to let this issue die. I believe this might be the most important issue for the next election. One of the beautiful things about STF government is that things can be corrected later.
Let me know your thoughts. And if you know how to contact Jeff Field, please let me know.
Fleet Captain Bob Hillis
CO - USS Columbus, Fleet 4